"Everything Happens for a Reason..."

I hate this phrase! I was recently watching a show on the ex-communicated Amish that leave their families. They kept on saying "everything happens for a reason..." Now, I'm sure most of us have grown up with this phrase and either heard it in a time of need, or offered it to a person going through a troubled time. And I have to ask... Did it ever help? Seriously, did you ever feel relief in knowing that the horrible tragedy that had taken place was SUPPOSED to happen? No wonder why people question the existence of a loving compassionate God! What we are saying is, "The God that has a plan for your life and loves you dearly meant for you to have this terrible tragedy befall on you. I don't know why but I'm sure He does... so you'll be ok!"
NO! Wrong! God created us in his image to glorify Him. He created us so that he could be with us have a close personal relationship with him. He has legions (THOUSANDS OF THOUSANDS) of angels in heaven praising him not stop. He wanted US to get to know him. 
       ***Time out***
             Not saying we aren't meant to worship him because we are so please don't misconstrue the   point I'm trying to make in that he wanted more from us.
       ***Time IN***
God gave us free will. The choice to eat of the fruit in the garden and we did. Simple laws of physics say, for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction.  So in that case yes, everything does happen for a reason, we make choices they have consequences. Some good, some bad. Some we get lucky and some we don't.  The matter of the situation is that God is not a puppet master. He isn't up there above the clouds running drunk drivers into cars and killing innocent people. Sometimes it is the choices that we, or even some complete stranger make on a daily basis that determine what will happen.  My older brother was killed in a car accident when he was 3, before I was born. My mom, sister, and brother t-boned into a car in and intersection. The impact severed his brain stem and he died three days later in ICU. I dont blame God, (or satan as some like to give him credit for things he can't control) I don't blame my mom, or the other driver. The fact of the matter is that in a split second a series of choices came together and their outcome was a brother that I never got to meet.
However, through dealing with the loss of my brother my parents have been able to minister to so many families who are going through the exact same thing. Families that otherwise have no one who could understand the pain, the guilt, and the loss of their child. But God used my parents to help them get through it.  Knowing that sometimes that it sucks. There is nothing good about the loss of a child, but from it you can emerge better, stronger, and more equipped to deal with all that life has. So then where did we get this idea that, "God did it!"


And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose. Romans 8:28


I blame this verse! This is the culprit that holy folk use to make things feel better. And I will concede, rightfully so. God is making a promise to us here. Not that nothing bad will happen, and not that he is going to purposefully cause anything bad to happen. But that sometimes, things will happen. And when they do, he has got it under control. God has a plan for our lives and he wants to share it with us. Not all at once, but like pieces in a puzzle. Each piece perfectly crafted. God uses difficult times to make us who we are and who he wants us to be. It would have been a lot easier if Adam and Eve hadn't ruined it for everyone. But this is what we got to work with. 
God sent his son to take a way our sins and sent the Holy Spirit to guide us through the tough times. And he uses those trials to yes sometimes break us down to our foundation where we have to question what is God to us. Where is He and can we trust Him. You see, that's how relationships are formed. Not through happy fun times, they just make it look nicer; but through the fire that tempers us, forms us, molds us. 
Next time you find yourself in a tough situation, stand tall. It is going to be tough, but it doesn't matter what is happening, God wants to use it to build you and strengthen you... If you let him.